My deepest thanks to my favorite toddler wrangler for giving me some excellent tips this week. She may have retired for the next few baby-making years, but Miss Kim is my go-to gal for advice on my terrorist... I mean toddler.
He just had his second birthday and got a multitude of toy sets with a million pieces each. When sitting in the middle of his hurricane wondering how on Earth I was going to organize it all on a zero-dollar budget, Miss Kim suggested that I use my clear shoe containers (I have a million of them) to group and organize each set in an easy-to-stack, easy-to-view way. Brilliant! Now, it is much easier for him to choose what he would like to play with and for him to know where to put things away when I'm choosing my battles to win the war.
Today, I told Miss Kim about his temper tantrums. I'm sure every other mother of a young two year old thinks the same as I do, but - man - his fits are horrible! He even sniffs of the possibility that he isn't going to get his way and the screaming starts. I don't know what exactly has possessed my happy little baby over the past couple of weeks, but this little demon can't be stopped once he gets going.
Miss Kim explained about the ABCs of temper taming. A is the antecedent or what sets him off (aka not getting his way). B is the behavior or his reaction (aka the screaming and kicking fit). C is the consequence or how I will react. That's the kicker. The million dollar question. What do I do??
First, I need to reign in my own temper. Hey, he gets his somewhere, and it is not all from his father. After taking a deep breath and taking stock of my ABCs, I have decided to set aside a "Time Out" station for him to sit at until he is finished crying. I explain to him calmly that he isn't to move until he is finished crying, then I ignore him.
If he decides he wants to move before he is finished crying, I stand above him and force him to stay until he is finished. Talk about a battle of wills! Sometimes it becomes a true standoff, but I try to win the majority of the time. Eventually, I'm hoping that he gets the whole concept of time out and tries to avoid it as much as possible.
Miss Kim also suggested an egg timer to give him a concrete end goal. "When the timer dings, you may get up." Anything to help him realize that his behavior isn't going to get him the reaction he wants. Maybe the egg timer is really for me...
Once again, BRILLIANT, Miss Kim! Thank you.
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